If you once knew me, and I'm just a person "who you knew back then",
You'll be amazed that your name is here, because I remember you.
This is just going to be plain.
I shouldn't be listening to music this time of the day. But I guess I'm at the point where patience can't beat how boring I feel right now. I'm supposed to be inside my room, reading a book, probably reciting the Quran and also doing some bloody revision that Aziem and I have been promising for days to get it done with. I am bored, I am bad, I am sad, I am miserable.
I hate myself for having someone remind me that I need to study. I mean, I had Aziem reminding me to study because I am so lazy to do so myself. How the hell am I supposed to be better at studies if I keep lazing around and do nothing?
And right now, the only thing I can do is listen to Mayday Parade and type away because I am so.. hopeless and I have nothing better to do but trying to figure out why I am feeling so weirded out today. Seriously, I even felt the urge to click on every name there is on my MSN list and
try to make conversation - even when I know they'd think I'm just another weird person looking for someone to talk to.
I miss school. And that's just sad. Because I hate school. I hate school so much I don't feel like going there anymore, but I still miss it. I miss Aziem, I miss Syafaf, I miss Afiqah, I miss Ainaa and I miss Abang and Kak Nurul and I miss Mukmeen and I miss Uwe, I miss Atuk, I miss Kak Dinie, I miss Ajiq, I miss Faris and Syahmi, I miss kampung, I miss waking up every morning and have Uwe's yummy food on the table, I miss Uwe asking me whether I've had breakfast yet or not. I miss Mukmeen driving me to school, I miss playing Guitar Hero in Mukmeen's room eventhough that was just a few days, I miss having the dinner table full of people surrounding it. I even miss Kak Aimi, and Nazrin. And Adam Ariff. And Reene. I miss people so badly right now.
I miss people so much I feel like I should list it down. I miss 1 Jujur. That's recent. Because I stumbled upon Alyssa's photo album on Facebook and I saw familiar faces that aren't just familiar. But I had moments with these people. 2006, I was in 1 Jujur and I had Nazratul and Adlin and they were super crazy people and Alyssa was all... crazy with Daniel Radcliffe. And, Aina Afiqah. Oh my god, she's crazy but we were best friends. And well, I had good moments with them. Even if it was just one year.
And Faiqah? She was my EVERYTHING in 2006. She's the only person I have EVER talked to on the phone for more than an hour. She'd call me in the morning when I'm still asleep and just talk away. I mean, I don't do the talking but she does, BUT STILL, the fact that I could be the one to listen to her blabbering is okay enough. And then I went to this Kem Ibadah thingy, we had to like, volunteer ourselves to go in front and talk about how we love our best friend and I don't know where I got the courage from, but I raised my hand, took the microphone and talked about her. Because you know, after Primary school, I was all alone. All my friends went to Seafield and when I went to USJ13, Faiqah was the person who was willing to be friends with me. Well, it's not like it's a big problem for anyone to be friends with me or whatever. -____-; but yeah. you get it.
I miss 2 Ilmu and 3 Ilmu. I had friends for classmates back then. Right now they're just.. classmates. I miss Najihah and Bazlin. I miss Yuvanesh. OMG I Miss Yuvanesh so much I can even cry right now. We'd talk about ANYTHING in class. He reads fantasy books which is so awesome because I hardly have guy friends who read. And then, we'd talk about movies. And we'd talk so much during English that Mr.Gan would give me this stare. I miss Justin, I miss Isaac, I miss Danial Hafiz, I miss IZZUL, I miss telling SUPER LONG stories to Najihah. I remember that one time I was so amazed by "Behind Enemy Lines" that I told the whole story to her. The whole meaning, from start to end, because I was so amazed. And I did sound effects like "bang bang bang" to describe the guns and Danial Hafiz was looking at me and he was laughing at me HAHAHA. And then Farhan, the guy's a great person. He can draw really well and we would discuss music like it's provided in our examination. I'd recommend him a song, and he'd recommend me a song. Which we both would learn to love. He's still around, but not as much. :(
AND GAH. WHY AM I TYPING SO FAST?!
I miss Primary school friends who I used to be close with. I miss Ammar, I always laugh at his jokes and right now it's pretty cool that I still hear his jokes. I miss Anisah. The old Anisah who was my best friend when I was in Primary. She used to draw me stuffs and just give it to me and I remember the picture she drew before we parted. And then I miss Syafaf, I miss her so badly that I passed by her house that day, I just felt so sad that I don't get to see her. I miss Danial, I don't remember the last time we even talked that much. All I ever do now is say hi, and ask him what he's doing. I mean, seriously, I even think he's so bored of me that I can't GET MYSELF to agree with him when he says I'm not boring. He doesn't even care about what I'm doing at that moment, so why should I bother making conversations with him? Oh yeah, because I miss him so much. That's why. I miss Aris, because he always calls me from MCKK and now HE DOESN'T. And yeah, he's so far away.
And then I miss Faris. He used to be really brotherly with me and I used to be like the little short friend tagging along with him and helping him with stuffs like when he was with Syafaf last time. We were good buddies. And then Syamil. Oh my God, can you believe it? We were SO close last time. Even some of his family members know me. I used to go to his house last time with Faris and Anisah and now time just flies and those memories seem vague to me. Oh but it's clear now alright. I miss Ariff too, we've been chatting this holiday on MSN and well, I MISS HIM TOO :( I miss Raizil, Sofieya. GREEN HOUSE MEMBERS.
Also, Chan Yuan Ping and, Yang Li Lian. She was my first best friends EVER in primary school. They'd come over to my old house in USJ17 and we'd swim in the swimming pool and it was just.. plain fun. Yuan Ping's still around, but Li Lian. :( I haven't seen her for four years. And that's so long. She's the master of badminton. She went to some sport school and gah, I hope she's well.
I miss the teachers, I miss Cikgu Hasnor, I miss Puan Junaita, I miss Cikgu Zainal, Cikgu Norlela, Cikgu Asnira, Cikgu Helmi, Cikgu Wan Zalina, Cikgu Rizal, Cikgu Razhari and all the others. Truthfully speaking, the teachers in Primary schools are way better than those in High Schools. I mean, sure, for Primary teachers, they just handle little kids, and in High school, it's much tougher cause the kids are thicker in the head and don't give a damn about anything. But honestly? Anything's possible.
I miss KINDERGARTEN. Hanif, Fateha, Nazrin, Raja Aiman, Mohd Aiman, Khalid. And then I'd miss my kindergarten teacher. I miss the concerts and sports day. I love my mom and dad for opening this school for their children. That was a big sacrifice from them. They provided us the best education for me and my brothers.
I even miss people whom I go to Hajj with last two years. I had Hamizah, Haziqah, Hazman, Sakinah, and Safwan. Oh boy don't get me started on these little kids. They are my life. I love them so much because they're like family for me for that whole 44 days. Safwan just makes me smile, because he is so unique. Everyone loves him. And then there's those.. makciks. and pakciks. Who can't stop joking around when we're on the bus. And I also miss Amir. AHAHAHA it's funny because I didn't really talk to that guy. But I miss him all the same. Because he brought an impact to my life that let me shift from not believing to believing that there is 'love at first sight'. I fell in love with him
Sorry, this will be the ONE and ONLY post I will ever post about how sad and bored I am at times. For a moment I felt like I needed to do it. And no one's gonna read it anyway. So I might as well just.. let it be.
And from this post, you'll know how much people I've known in my life and are just.. memories to me right now. Not many people stick, but life just goes on doesn't it?
